I try typically to avoid large conflicts like the one going on currently with Chick-fil-a. It is not that I do not have an opinion, it is that I believe that pushing my opinion does all of us very little good. Which is a little about what this post is about. I love my wife, but I wouldn’t want anyone to share their opinion on if that is right or wrong. I love chicken sandwiches, but I wouldn’t want that to be a statement. The problem with the whole debate is our inability to both love other people and eat a chicken sandwich without having to share our relatively meaningless irrational opinions about either.

In reality that is the heart of this whole problem. On one hand you have Chick-fil-a sharing their opinion on why certain people shouldn’t love one another, then on the other you have people telling Chick-fil-a what their opinion is on the company’s opinion.

Forgotten in this are a two very large groups of people, one who mostly just want to live their lives and love who they want to love and another who just wants to make intestinal love to a chicken sandwich without it being a political statement.

The fact is that with the extremes of the situation, the opinion people, neither are ever going to see the other person’s point of view by the actions the opposing party takes. Negative action always impacts the relationship negatively.

Those who truly care about the relationships, the lovers both of chicken and of each other, get caught in the middle of this negative relationship and it severely impacts their ability to have positive relationships with each other.

Your opinion on who someone loves and where people decide to buy their deep fried poultry of choice should not matter. What should matter is your ability to engage in meaningful relationships with the people around you. That is what life is about.

As I raise a daughter I want her to know that we can always find things that others do that do not match what our opinion on what should be done. The real challenge is trying to find ways to love everyone, and their chicken sandwich, in a meaningful way that has a positive impact on the world around us.

  • http://twitter.com/erniebufflo Sarah

    If it were just the COO’s “opinion,” I swear there wouldn’t be a boycott of CFA. But instead, it’s that their nonprofit arm has donated more than $5 million to organizations that oppose equality for gay people. The funding for that nonprofit comes directly from CFA, which means they’re literally using the money I pay for my nuggets to support causes I don’t believe in. It’s not something I’d like, break up with a friend over, but it’s a bigger deal to me than just an executive holding an anti-gay opinion.

    • http://twitter.com/jgreghenderson Greg Henderson

      I agree. Which is why I believe they are pushing their opinion rather than just sharing it. Same goes for all the people lining up at CFA to give money today that they honestly hope will be donated in the same sense. That is half of my problem.

      The other half is those who believe the whole “equal and opposite reaction” type of response. Making out in front of CFA is probably not going to be a good representation of your side. In fact I think it would kill any potential ability to have the other side understand your personal beliefs. 

      Ultimately this all is resolved through relationships. One side needs to see the point of view of the other and to make that happen they both have to realize some level of common ground (which is the ability to love someone deeply) and that can only happen through getting to know each other. 

      • http://twitter.com/erniebufflo Sarah

         Totally. I think the only thing that really changes anyone’s opinion about an “other” group is getting to know members of it. I know the main reason I care about equality for gay folks is that I know and love a bunch of them!

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